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Military Jokes and Humor

Navy and Marine Rules for Gun Fighting

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SpecOps Sniper Warfare
MILpictures by Tom Weber / The Image Bank / Getty Images
USMC Rules For Gun Fighting
  • Bring a gun. Preferably, bring at least two guns. Bring all of your friends who have guns.
  • Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.
  • Only hits count. A close miss is still a miss.
  • If your shooting stance is good, you're probably not moving fast enough nor using cover correctly.
  • Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral and diagonal movements are preferred.)
  • If you can choose what to bring to a gunfight, bring a long gun and a friend with a long gun.
  • In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics.
  • They will only remember who lived.
  • If you are not shooting, you should be communic- ating, reloading, and running.
  • Accuracy is relative: most combat shooting standards will be more dependent on "pucker factor" than the inherent accuracy of the gun.
  • Use a gun that works EVERY TIME.
  • Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.
  • Always cheat = always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
  • Have a plan.
  • Have a back-up plan, because the first one won't work.
  • Use cover and concealment as much as possible.
  • Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.
  • Don't drop your guard.
  • Always tactically reload and threat scan 360 degrees.
  • Watch their hands. Hands kill. (In God we trust. Everyone else, keep your hands where I can see them).
  • Decide to be AGGRESSIVE enough, QUICKLY enough.
  • The faster you finish the fight, the less shot up you will get.
  • Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.
  • Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.
  • Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun, the caliber of which does not start with a "4".


Navy Rules for Gun Fighting

  • Go to Sea
  • Send the Marines
  • Drink Coffee
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