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Military Jokes and Humor

Jokes, humorous stories, and funny photos about the United States Military, including jokes and humor about the United States Army, Air Force, Navy, Marine Corps, and Coast Guard.
  1. Air Force Humor (41)
  2. Army Humor (46)
  3. Marine Corps Humor (33)
  4. Navy Humor (41)
  5. Photo Captions (6)

ASVAB Scores
You can tell a lot from the ASVAB score...

Basic Training
The funniest thing happened while attending boot camp...

Getting in Shape for Basic Training
I'm often asked about the best way to exercise in order to get into shape for basic training...

45 Reasons to Re-Enlist
If this won't keep you in the military, nothing will...

Afghanistan Christmas Carol
T'was the night before Christmas...

Air Force Vs. the Army
I'll drink to that.

Airborne Ranger
Are they really God?

Airplanes Vs. Women
Why Pilots Prefer Airplanes Over Women….

Anaconda Attacks
What to do if you are attacked by an anaconda in the Amazon Jungle...

bin Laden at the Pearly Gate
He didn't think it would turn out this way...

bin Laden's "To Do" List
A list of things bin Laden wishes to get accomplished.

Bin Laden/Taliban Riddles
A selection of riddles about the Taliban and Bin Laden.

Birth Control
New method of birth control for members of the Armed Forces.

Which service has the bravest enlisted folks?

British Officer Fitness Reports Statement
You gotta love them Brits.

Building an NCO
How to build an NCO.

Camouflage Wear Policies
Camouflage uniform wear policies of the military services.

Captured Cows
What to do with captured cows...

Career Field Management
Career Field Management policies of the military services.

Combat for Dummies
A few common sense rules for combat….

Making the best of a bad situation...

A D.I.'s Rules for Dating his Daughter.

Dear China
A letter to China from the people of the United States.

Decorations & Awards Standards
Decoration & Award standards for the military services.

Definition of "Colonel"
What does "Colonel" really mean?.....

Deploying Vowels to Bosnia
A necessary National Policy....

DOD Super Computer
The Department of Defense Super-Computer which can solve any military problem...

Duty Hours
Duty hour standards for the military services.

The real evolution of mankind.

Careful what the recruiter promises you...

Favorite Song
General Grant's favorite songs.

Fright Show
The four scariest things in the Military.

Good Night
Good night actually means "Shut Up."

Haircut Standards
Haircut standards of the military services.

Headlines - Blimp Downs Chinese Jets
Well, it *might* be true.....

Hitler and the Pig
Phrasing is everything....

How the Military Determines Unit Staffing
Ever wonder how the military determines which job positions will be assigned to a unit?

How to Annoy your Mil Roommate
List of ways to drive your barracks roommate right up the wall.

Intelligence Analyst Resignation
A military intelligence analyst resigns...

Interpreting Performance Reports
What those comments on performance reports really mean...

Iraq Jokes
A handful of short Iraq Riddles.

Joint Task Force
There is a lot of talk about the United Nations creating a combined strike force with troops from several nations included in it...

K-9 Dog Veteran
Talking dog for $20.00?.....

Key to my Heart
It's the little things that count.....

Equal Rights?

Language Barrier
How the Services communicate.

Last Great Act of Defiance
How to deal with headhunters...

Leave & Liberty Standards
Leave & liberty standards of the military services.

Lessons of a Vietnam Helicopter Crewman
Rules to live by in flight combat.

Lincoln and McClellan
Disagreement between President Lincoln and General McClellan...

Lincoln's Prayer
Lincoln and Davis....

A walk through the desert.

Meal Standards
Meal & ration standards of the military services.

Memo From Bin Laden
Memo from Bin Laden to his "Cavemates."

So, where do those Military Specifications really come from?

Military Academy Jokes
A couple of dozen short Military Academy jokes.

Military Jokes and Humor – Old Guys
Jokes, humor, and funny stories about the Military. Old Guys

Military Prayer
A little officer bashing.....

Military Protocol
Protocol standards of the military services.

Military Rules
Each of the branches have their own rules of conduct and behavior.

Military Terminology
Watch that latest military blockbuster movie, but you're at a loss as to some of the military terms they used? Here's a basic primer.

Mother's Request
Lincoln's reply to a Mother's demand...

Murphy's Rules of Combat
What can go wrong, will.

National Guard Glossary
Definitions from the Weekend Warriors...

NATO Bombing
13 Excuses NATO uses to justify bombing the wrong target...

NCOs and Officers
A different way of looking at things...

New Enlistment Oaths
Raise your right hand, and repeat after me.

New Name
With the advent of the fighting in Afghanistan, U.S. G.I.'s have a new name.

Officer Insignia
A simple explanation of the origin of officer rank insignia...

Officer Promotions
The real-deal common sense test.

Orders to Troops in Iraq
Recent orders to military troops deployed to Iraq…

Pilot Wisdom
Quotes and bits of wisdom from military pilots…

Playing Games
Good bet.

Playing Golf
That's gratitude, for ya....

Promotion to NCO
You can take the boy out of the country, but...

It's important that every military mission have a specific purpose...

Real Sergeants
Do real sergeants eat privates?

Remote Assignment
You wouldn't want to be stationed there.

He who laughs last...

Saddam’s Capture Anniversary
Top 10 ways Saddam celebrated the anniversary of his capture…

Saving the Cavalry
I guess that you never heard how my Great Great Great Half Uncle Herman once saved an entire company of US cavalry from marauding indians...

Lousy shot.......

Soldier, Sailor, & Airman
Interservice Rivalry at its best.

Special Ops
Snake Eaters!

Stupid Questions
Stupid questions get good answers.

TDY Procedures
Due to the budget cut, new TDY procedures are in effect.

You know your unit is too advanced when.....

Ten Ways to Make Basic Training Tougher
Are you one of those who think today's military basic training is too easy? Here's 10 ways to make it harder.

The Airman & Marine
An Air Force person and a Marine in a bar...

The Delta Force Test
Are you ready for the final test?........

The General's Valet
The retired general asked his former aid to come work for him...

The Military Computer
The perfect enlisted computer...

The Real Difference in Rank
And don't let anyone tell you different.

The Snake Theory
The Differential Theory of US Armed Forces (Snake Model) upon encountering a snake in the Area of Operations.

Too Many
A Russian Private, Cuban Private, American Private, and American Colonel are riding on a train....

Too Old to Fight
You're never too old to fight....

Too Smart
Recruiting problems.

VA Home Loan
A lawyer tries to arrange for a VA home loan for his client...

Veteran's Bar
You can't beat the prices in this bar...

Veterans Day
Seen any good movies lately?

War Between Iraq and Ireland
Ireland declares war on Iraq.....

War is Hell
....but maybe it's not Hell for everyone.

What Time is It?
Well, it depends, actually…..

Who's Crazier?
Watch out, Bin Laden.....We may just be crazier than you are!

Word/Phrase Origin
The humorous origins of several military words and phrases...

You’ve Got to be Kidding Me
Where the phrase, You’ve Got to be Kidding Me, came from. British OER Standards

Comics and the Military
Comics have had many uses, where the military is concerned, bolster morale, to offer therapeutic relief, “how-to” and to support of the troops.

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