| It's Off to MEPS We Go! | |
| A Firsthand Account of a Visit to New Orleans MEPS, by Dave W. Brown |
Page 4, Continued from Page 3
After completing the test, I was sent to get my blood taken. There was a line of 5 or so ahead of me, but the wait was just over 10 minutes. The medical staff member asked my name and made me verify my social security number. He then sat me in a chair and drew the blood. If you're squeamish about this sort of thing, don't worry: it doesn't hurt. It did take some time, however. Be patient, stay relaxed, and look away. After my blood was drawn, I was up to give my urine sample. The line in the bathroom wasn't long. I was given a little cup, and you go to the urinal and "give a sample" (Half full). Yes, there is an observer, but no, he is not "in your business." He just sat to the side and made sure there was no questionable activity. Afterwards, I stood in a line holding my sample, waiting to check it in. It was a little awkward, and the line moved very slowly. Please don't make the joke, "It looks just like beer." It's old. He's heard it. Next up was the blood pressure test. I sat in a little chair next to a machine that did the readings. It was very similar to the machine at most drug stores in America, only an observer also checked my heart rate. The entire process lasted only a couple of minutes. The eye exam was quite interesting. The "read line 9" was the same as at your local Department of Motor Vehicles or eye-doctor, but the depth perception test was a killer. There were 10 or so rows of 5 circles, and I had to locate the circle closest to me (It reminded me of the "Magic Eye" books). I had some trouble with a couple of rows, and the examiner told me to close my eyes and rest for a second. I did, and was able to spot the closest ring right away. I was approved for 20/20 vision, which was remarkable because I wear glasses normally. I suppose I ate my carrots that week. The next station was the dreaded physical. Actually, it wasn't that bad. About 10 of us were brought into a large room with a doctor, and he instructed us to strip to our boxers and stand in a line facing the opposing wall. The doctor walked up and down and gave us a cursory evaluation for tattoos or piercings. We were then instructed to touch our toes with our next straight down. The doctor walked up and down, examining our spines. Then, we were instructed to do various balance and motor skills tests. We had to stick out our left legs and move our toes, then rotate our feet, move them up and down, kick, and so on. Same with the right leg. We also had to do similar motions with our hands and arms. We had to duck walk, which wasn't as goofy as it sounds. We had a visual acuity test, where we followed the doctors fingers with our eyes, and he turned out the light and checked out pupils. Air Force people also had to "pop" their ears. The whole process lasted 20 minutes at the most. Then, a large screen was put up and we had to individually meet with the doctor. We had to "Turn your head and cough" and bend over and let him check for any Hemorrhoids. Of course it was awkward, but everybody had to do it, and I'd take it any day over a thorough "finger check". After I was released and dressed, I was up for the hearing test. It was lunch time, and several of the staff were eating. After a 15 minute wait, the nurse from this morning put me in a supposedly soundproof booth where I donned a set of earphones and was given a "Jeopardy-buzzer" that I was to click when I heard a beep. This was a long process, and coupled with the sound of my own breathing and the sounds of the people outside, it was quite stressful. When it was over, the nurse opened the door and recorded my score. She made a funny face when she looked at them, which worried me. "Is it bad," I asked. "Nope, normal." That was a relief, and I was on to my last stop of the day: the personal interview with the doctor. The line lasted 15 minutes or so, and I was pretty nervous about it. I had a potentially disqualifying breathing problem on my medical form, and I was afraid he'd DQ me. Prior to leaving for MEPS however, I did my homework and got necessary documentation from my doctor regarding my status, including pulmonary function test results. I'd also broken a bone when I was quite young, but didn't have any details or paperwork (I wasn't even sure which bone). The doctor called me in, and had me read a paragraph to him to check for literacy. If you can read this, you shouldn't have any problem with it. He then asked me about my "yes" questions on the medical form (He didn't seem to care about the injury when I was 5). I had rehearsed my description prior to going to MEPS. That's not to say I was dishonest or withholding in any way -- quite the opposite. It was detailed, accurate, and concise, and covered my history and current status (I left NOTHING out). He was pleased that I had taken a pulmonary function test, and signed off on it. I was in. Because I am joining the Air Force, I was sent to a little room with a weight machine in it. The machine itself resembled a guillotine, with a large lifting bar in front. The nurse demonstrated it sans the weights. There were 4 different weight levels to lift. I was able to lift all 4, although the 4th was certainly the most difficult. The desk clerk took my folder of information (which I had on hand throughout the day) and sent it for the day's final processing. He told me to go eat lunch, which was a great relief because I was starving. I walked to the snack room, where an attractive Subway girl was preparing to give the "Last Call." There were 6 sandwiches left, all ham, so my choice was pretty easy. Bottled water was the drink of choice, and I had one as well. It was delicious, and I woofed it down in minutes, and started on the potato chips and cookie. After guzzling down my water and cleaning up my trash, I headed back to the medical room where I awaited my final documents. I was given my folder, and brought it to my Air Force liaison "You're finished with MEPS!" the airman said. My day at MEPS was complete. I collected my bag from the closet and returned to my car and left the base. I visited my recruiter and told her the good news, and began selection of a job. I intend to join Security Forces. GUIDE NOTE: Because Dave is joining the Reserves, the job selection process is done through the Recruiter. Had Dave been enlisting on active duty, the MEPS experience would have included job selection, a Security Interview, and (likely) enlistment in the Delayed Entry Program (DEP). Additionally, Dave took the ASVAB and physical on the same day. At many (most?) MEPS facilities, today, the ASVAB is performed on the afternoon of arrival, and the medical/job selection process is accomplished on the following day. ---------------------------- Some final thoughts on MEPS:
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