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Army Humor

Army Humor. Military jokes and humorous stories about and concerning the United States Army.

Airborne Soldier
You might be an Airborne Soldier, if....

Army Christmas
Operations orders to ensure Christmas goes as planned.

Army Medical
Getting the short end of the brush....

Army Ranger Diet
Now available for civilians....

Army Special Forces Vs. Marines
May the better men win!

Barbie & G.I. Joe
Barbie is leaving Ken for G.I. Joe?

Country Folks in the Army
Well, if that ain't country.....

New Program?

Dear John Letter
The best response to a "Dear John" Letter...

Dictionary Definition of hooah
What does the dictionary have to say about this unique term?

Digging a Hole
What do you call that hole, anyway?...

Don't Mess with First Sergeants
Don't mess around with the "Top."

Fall Out
A group of soldiers in formation....

Great Comeback
One of the World's greatest comebacks....

Last words.

Helicopter Crash....
One thing at a time, please....

How to Tell You're no Longer in the Army
You know you're finally a civilian when...

Initial Here
Needs a new secretary.

What to do with leftovers...

Letter Home
The young soldier writes a letter home from the "war zone."

Moms Know Best
Always listen to Mom....

No Ears
The colonel had no ears...

Officer Vs. NCO Observations
Who's more observant?

Should have asked for artillery.

Physics Problem
Gravitational difference between First Sergeants and Sergeant Majors.

Ranger School Motto
Unofficial Ranger School motto...

Rejected U.S. Army Recruiting Slogans
The new slogans that didn't make the cut......

Returning from Remote
Rules to live by.

Separating the Men from the Fools
It's not as hard as you think to separate the men from the fools.

Sick Soldiers
Best to be at the front of the line...

Snow Bound
Housing regulations can be funny that way.

Soda Machine
You never know who you're going to meet at the soda machine...

Special Forces Rules of Combat
Rules to help keep you alive in combat...

Spit on your Grave
Wouldn't you just love to....

Swedish Definitions
Exactly what do you call that in Sweden?

You gotta know the right words to use.

You might be a "Tanker," if.....

Telephone Repair Man
A telephone repair man joins the army...

The Accident
Careful how you drive.

The Boy and the Donkey
Some soldiers decide to tease a boy leading a donkey...

The Exception
Sometimes the traditional way isn't the best...

The General's Visit
Careful who you ask...

The Homecoming
Music Lessons

The Kiss
Choose your traveling companions wisely.

Too Hooah?
Is your family too hooah?

Voice Mail
Official Army Voice Mail

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