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In
keeping with the latest round of military budget cuts, changes will be
made to the Joint Military Travel Regulations (JMTR). Effective Monday
the following revised procedures apply:
Lodging
All military personnel performing temporary duty (TDY) are encouraged
to stay with relatives and friends while on government business travel.
If weather permits, public areas such as parks should be used as temporary
lodging sites. Bus terminals, train stations, and office lobbies may provide
shelter in periods of inclement weather.
Transportation
Hitchhiking is the preferred mode of travel in lieu of commercial transport.
Luminescent safety vests will be issued to all military personnel prior
to their departure on TDY. Bus transportation will be used only when work
schedules require such travel. Airline tickets will be authorized in extreme
circumstances and the lowest fares will be used. For example, if a meeting
is scheduled in Washington D.C., but a lower fare can be obtained by traveling
to Omaha, NE, then travel to Omaha will be substituted for travel to Washington
D.C.
Meals
Expenditures for meals will be limited to an absolute minimum. It should
be noted that certain grocery and specialty chains, such as Costco, Hickory
Farms, General Nutrition centres, and occasionally Safeway often provide
free samples of promotional items. Entire meals can be obtained in this
manner. We realize many of you survive your weekends this way.
Travelers
should also be familiar with indigenous roots, berries, and other protein
sources available at their destinations. If restaurants must be utilized,
travelers should use "all you can eat" salad bars. This is especially
effective for employees traveling together as one plate can be used to
feed the entire group.
Military
Personnel are also encouraged to bring their own food on business travel.
Cans of tuna fish, Spam, and Beefaroni can be consumed at your leisure
without the necessary bother of heating or costly preparation. Cost of
these items will not be reimbursed.
Miscellaneous
All military personnel are encouraged to devise innovative techniques
in effort to save tax dollars. One enterprising individual has already
suggested that money could be raised during airport layover periods, which
could be used to defray travel expenses. In support of this idea, red
caps will be issued to all personnel prior to their departure so that
they may earn tips by helping others with their luggage. Small plastic
roses and ballpoint pens will also be available to personnel so that sales
may be made as time permits. Proceeds must be turned into the military
finance section at the conclusion of the TDY.
We welcome
any suggestions for further fiscal innovations. Remember, We invite
you to be a Waste Buster
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