is a lot of talk about the United Nations creating a combined strike force
with troops from several nations included in it.
work? Let's take a look at one operation. A combined force beach landing
on a tropical island.
troops hit the beach.........
- The Royal
Marines go fishing.
- The US
Marines wait for CNN to arrive.
- The French
don't care whose beach it is; it's French territory now, and say the
English gave them no other choice.
- The Canadians
watch the Americans very closely, then offer to guard their landing
- The Dutch
have a beach party and smoke some dope saying the English don't understand
- The Italians
- The Germans
land and build a car factory.
- The West
Indians go looking for the Dutch.
- The Austrians
just watch the Russians and Germans.
- The Chinese
win the natives hearts and minds then kill them.
- The SEALs
arrive after dark and kill anyone who is not a SEAL.
- The Aussies
and Kiwis land then start fighting each other over a sheep.
- The South
Americans send a contingent of 2000 generals.
- The South
Africans start shooting at anyone with a tan.
- The Saudi's
start drilling for oil.
- The Russians
open a chain of massage parlours.
- The Brit
airborne troops get charged with murder even though they have not opened
- The Spanish
- The Portuguese
are late but blame the Spaniards.
Force makes a movie about the landing.
- The Greeks
and Turks turn up then send a bill to the Yanks and Brits.
- The British
Army cannot come because all six of them have flu.
- The Japanese
don't know who owns what ships and decide to sink them all.
- The Californian
National Guard contingent won't land until someone opens a Starbucks.
- The New
Yorkers paint their Amtrak's yellow and will take you ashore for 50
- The Irish
Army will be late because they say they are still celebrating St. Patrick's
- The Israeli's
start building a kibbutz and shell the Palestinians as a precaution.
- The Scandinavians
like it off shore and stay there killing whales for the Japanese.
- The Polish
tunnel under the beach looking for coal.
- The Palestinians
say it used to be theirs but the English gave it away.
- The Oklahomans
have no damn idea what a beach is.
- The Scottish
claim to have found the beach first but accuse the English of stealing
- The Texans
look for anyone bad mouthing them.
- The Mexicans
invade Arizona by mistake.
- The Welsh
say it's King Arthur's last resting place but the English stole it.
- The Swiss
apply for a bank charter.
- The Lybians
blow up two UN planes.
- The UN
will send an Ambassador if the member states pay their dues.
- The Kentuckians
open a KFC.
- The Panamanians
ask the U.S. what they should do.
- The Floridians
demand a recount and free Prozac.
- The EU
want to set up a commission of 50,000 administrators paid for by the
- The Swedes
just want to screw.
- The Michigan
contingent issue a safety recall and sue General Motors.
- The Matell
Corp. sends 10,000 GI Joe's and one Barbie.
- Some guy
from Tennessee swears that Elvis and Jimmy Dean are just over the dunes.
- The Romanians
and Albanians finally arrive and surrender.
- The Coloradans
cut off the Kansan's water supply.
- H. M.
The Queen will give anyone a Knighthood if they can grab her a few hundred
acres or find a job for Charles.
- The New
Hampshire contingent declares that everyone there is Sooooo Cruel and
open a soup kitchen.
- The North
Koreans have no idea what is going on but blame America anyway.
State NG builds a monument to Bill Gates.
- The Pakistanis
build a Motel Six, a convenience store and gas station.
Carter arrives and declares peace.
W. Bush doesn't know where the island is, so he orders the U.S. Airforce
to bomb Hawaii.