|Military Jokes & Humor|
|Hitler and the Pig|
Adolf Hitler is speeding through Germany with his chauffeur at the wheel on his way to an important address.
Driving down a country road, the chauffeur (who is distracted, looking out the window at the countryside) doesn't see a pig walk out onto the road, and he hits in with the car.
Stopping the car, he jumps out, and Adolf climbs out also to see what is going on. The chauffeur, very distressed by what he's done asks Hitler what they should do, and Hitler tells him impatiently that they're in a hurry and they should move the pig to the side of the road and go to the address and worry about it later.
All the way to the address the chauffeur, who is a fairly good-hearted person despite his employer, is worried about the family who owned the pig and wondered how they'd react to discovering the pig, so when they arrived he asked Hitler whether he shouldn't drive back to the farm and let them know what happened.
Hitler agrees before hurrying to the podium, and the Chauffeur hurries back down the road.
Four hours later, stumbling down the road, his arms full of sausage and bread and his breath smelling of liquor.
Hitler in a rage demands to know what has happened to him, and the chauffeur explains, "I did what I thought was right. I went to the farm where I killed the pig. When I went and knocked on the door and gave them the news, they gave me this sausage and bread, fed me the best ale I've ever tasted and let me have their way with their beautiful nubile young daughter and then sent me on my way."
Adolf seemed confused by this and asks his chauffeur, "well what exactly did you tell them?"
To which the chauffeur replied, "I really can't understand it either, all I did was tell them "I'm Hitler's Chauffeur, and I killed the pig."